Making Scene Negotiation Effortless

A Guide to Using Our Scene Negotiation Tool

NoGrey was built to function as a 'Pre-Scene Negotiation Tool'. Our intent was to support users in focusing on the really important discussions required for safer play, whilst saving time and making the process a lot easier.

It is important to note that use of NoGrey is not intended to replace discussions prior to a scene. You should always talk to your partner(s) thoroughly before engaging with them. NoGrey simply hones the effectiveness and efficiency of these discussions.

HINT: NoGrey can be especially useful for those who may be a little shy about expressing their desires

Building a scene

Let’s assume you’ve set a time and place, added in a location (or chosen not to) and already selected your desired partner.

Negotiate BDSM play with NoGrey App

Negotiate BDSM play with NoGrey App

HINT: You do not need to have a partner on the app, you can issue a scene invite to anyone by sending them a link via any platform or medium.

1. Select your activities
Combine any of the 600+ interests available to you to begin outlining your perfect scene.

You are even able to specify if you are interested in only giving or receiving specific activities.

Negotiate BDSM play with ease

Negotiate BDSM play with ease

2. Communicate your desire visually
Both partners are able to quickly toggle sliders to clearly show:

  • How interested you are in a particular activity 

  • How experienced you are in that activity

  • What level of participation you are willing to explore

The selection is then displayed so that you can easily identify areas where your desires align and where you may need to hold a greater level of discussion.

Communicate your kinky fantasy easily.

Communicate your kinky fantasy easily.

3. Provide a guide on how the scene should ‘feel’
Again, sliders allow you to rapidly express the experience you are looking for.

Is the tone to be 'Sensual' or 'Distant'?

Do you wish to feel 'Cherished' or 'Degraded"?

This is where the true magic of NoGrey begins to shine. understanding the ‘tone’ of the scene your partner wishes to explore is critical to providing a great experience.

It is that easy. 1. 2. 3

For good measure, you may also outline your personal limits, and you are even able to add aftercare notes specific to your own needs.

How does the negotiation logic work

We’ve taken steps to ensure the tool isn’t misused.

To 'confirm' on a scene, both users need to agree on the same level of participation.

The person you are negotiating with has the ability to lower the scene's participation level. However, users are not able to increase the participation level above the highest level set by the other party. This is an intentional safeguard against users feeling 'pushed' into a level of participation greater than what they have indicated they are comfortable with. Kink is not about coercion.

Hard limits in kinky play

Hard limits in kinky play

Both users in the scene may have differing levels of interest and experience, these do not need to match to be able to progress.

Similarly, the scene ‘feelings’ can be reduced in scope. Here as well, users are prevented from extending the range into an area that wasn't initially indicated as acceptable.

Any limits that are added must be acknowledged and users can remove an interest all together before agreeing on a scene.


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Best new kink mobile app for BDSM

Best new kink mobile app for BDSM

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